Understanding Sexual Preference: A Detailed Explanation
Navigating your sexual identity involves recognizing your deep-seated attraction to others. How you express or act upon these feelings varies based on personal experiences and cultural background.
According to Vanessa K. Jensen, PsyD, ABPP, a pediatric psychologist, "Your sexual attraction is primarily internal. For some, it's clear who they're attracted to, while others need experiences to figure it out."
It's important to note that recognizing your attraction doesn't automatically equate to having sex. Some individuals may discover their sexual orientation from a young age, while others might find it evolves over time. Sexual orientation can be fluid, meaning who you're attracted to now might not be the same in the future.
Exploration of one's sexual orientation during adolescence, particularly the teenage years, is a common part of self-discovery and accepting traits in others. Attraction can be divided into romantic and sexual categories. While it's easy to assume these occur simultaneously, this isn't always the case. People may experience different degrees of attraction with different individuals for different reasons.
"These terms aren't forever labels," states Dr. Jensen. "People can change their feelings over time."
Sexual Orientation and How We Express Attraction
Sexual orientation can exist on a wide spectrum, leading to various types of relationships. You might find that your sexual orientation falls into more than one category.
Historically, members of the LGBTQ+ community have faced high levels of fear due to discrimination, violence, and rejection. These experiences can lead to anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, and other harmful conditions. According to a 2021 survey by The Trevor Project, 42% of LGBTQ youth considered suicide in the past year, and 75% experienced discrimination based on their sexual orientation at least once in their lives.
It's crucial to create a safe space for self-discovery and acceptance by offering support and forming trusted networks. "In finding your identity as a person," notes Dr. Jensen, "part of that is often asking, 'Who am I attracted to?' Parents should give kids permission to explore a range of identities and allow them to be fluid as it's part of figuring out who they are."
Below are some sexual orientations to consider (note that this list is not exhaustive):
Androsexual
This term refers to individuals attracted to men or masculinity.
Asexual
Asexual individuals experience little to no sexual attraction towards others. While this isn't always the case, asexuality can vary in many ways. For example, an individual might not experience sexual attraction, but their feelings about sexual behavior may differ depending on the situation.
Bisexual
Historically, this term describes someone attracted to both males and females. However, it's essential to understand that being bisexual doesn't mean equal attraction to all genders. Being in a relationship with someone does not necessarily negate one's bisexual identity.
Demisexual
Demisexual individuals may only find someone sexually attractive if they've developed an emotional or romantic connection with them.
Fluid
This term refers to individuals whose sexual orientation can change over time.
Gay
This term generally describes individuals who are emotionally, sexually, or romantically attracted to people of the same sex.
Heterosexual (or Straight)
Individuals who are emotionally, sexually, or romantically attracted to individuals of the opposite sex are considered heterosexual.
Lesbian
The term lesbian describes women who are emotionally, sexually, or romantically attracted to other women.
Pansexual
Similar to omnisexual, pansexual individuals are attracted to individuals regardless of their gender identity.
Queer
This term is an umbrella term for individuals who aren't exclusively heterosexual and can encompass anyone falling anywhere on the LGBTQ+ spectrum.
Questioning
Individuals who are unsure about their sexual orientation or exploring their sexuality can be considered questioning.
"Knowing when to disclose your sexual orientation to others is a personal decision," says Dr. Jensen. "The process of 'coming out' can take years, and it's important to do so only when you're ready, ensuring your safety and well-being."
- Sexual orientation can lead to various types of relationships and may exist on a spectrum, allowing it to overlap among different categories.
- Historically, members of the LGBTQ+ community have faced discrimination, violence, and rejection, which can negatively impact their mental health, leading to anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts.
- Educating oneself about different sexual orientations, such as androsexual, asexual, bisexual, demisexual, fluid, gay, heterosexual, lesbian, pansexual, queer, and questioning, can help foster understanding and acceptance.
- Mental health, especially when navigating one's sexual identity, is crucial, and seeking support from trusted networks can significantly influence one's journey towards self-discovery and acceptance.
- One's sexual orientation journey and self-disclosure are highly personal, taking time and happening only when an individual feels ready and safe to do so.
